Saturday, August 13, 2011

Together Time

If you've been married for more than a year or two
you likely know what I am going to say.

Life happens!

It gets so hard to carve out time for 
each other....even though we see each 
other multiple times daily
so often it is as if we are roommates
sharing a house.

I may be exaggerating just a bit
but I think most will understand what 
I am saying.
Too few are the times where we just sit
down and share goals and dreams
as we once did.
It seems too often that we are just trying to 
solve all of the problems, keep our kids moving
and even keep the dogs from piddling in the house
to think beyond that day.

Are you with me?
Or are you disappointed I would
admit such things?

when the opportunity came up to take 
Susanna to the airport I saw our chance
to get away.
Even if it is for less than 24 hours....
spending last evening together was worth it
all by itself.

We are in a hotel suite.
It sounds ritzy but in all reality the 
price wasn't bad at all.
After our horrible experience in Kentucky 
and finding this chain I have signed up for 
their rewards program and we are 
going to book these whenever possible.

So...anyway...back to the point of this post....
Last evening we sat for hours in our 
wonderful "living room" and just
talked.  Catching up on each others 
thoughts and feelings about where we are
and where we are headed.
There were no dogs climbing all over me....
I wasn't distracted by all the things that needed to be done.
It was good.
It was real.
We needed it so much.

I often long for those days back when we
were young and idealistic.
Before the reality of life and responsibility set in.
But, having said that, 
there is little I would change
in my life.
It is life.  
We are certainly living it!

But, we come away from this time spent 
together with renewed commitment to certain 
projects around the house which will 
help all of us live a better life.
We are planning to let go of 
a lot of stuff. 
Stuff that clutters and is hard to 
clean around.
Stuff that weighs us down.

Even better, 
we are going to work together to 
make it happen.
Because, in spite of the busyness that 
so often distracts we are a team.
When the kids are all grown and with 
families of their own,
if we are blessed 
to live long enough,
it will just be He and I again.

I want to be sure I don't have to 
become reacquainted with my sweet
Warren when the last one 
leaves the nest.
I want to be on the same page.

So, curiosity makes me ask....
If you care to share...
How do you stay connected with the 
one you married?


Mrs.Rabe said...

When Tim is on this shift (2nd) he calls every evening on his dinner break and we connect for a half hour. I also almost always wait up for him to get home.

We also try to go to breakfast once a week - just the two of us. He has one more week on second shift and then we will be on days, and the ways we connect will be different.

I am thinking a weekend away would be great!

Glad you two got some time together!


Amy said...

Oh, I think you are so smart! By the way if we don't talk about things to each other we all think we are alone in our problems. We are one week away from empty nest. So strange and emotional on a lot of levels. Glad to have lots of time again with my husband but oh so sad. Anyway, you are smart to focus on loving him and enjoying him. We take walks each day even if only for 30 minutes and talk. We try to "go out" to eat and talk at least once every 2 or 3 weeks. Weekends away are wonderful but can be few and far between. Just making sure you do the "extra" nice things like texting sweet thoughts or emails, leaving notes...Blessings on this journey!

Vee said...

Sometimes I do feel this way and it's because I have allowed busyness to take priority. Healthy time away from each other is good for a marriage and planning time together on purpose, as you've done, is wonderful and so needed. Even my blogging friends, whom I wrote about today, described the joy of being in one another's company for an extended vacation with no ties back to the office or the continual pull of family and friends. So my recommendation is to plan a trip to the Northeast and the Maritime Provinces real soon! ☺

Thank you so much for the sweet surprise. I will be discussing it in an upcoming post perhaps Tuesday or Wednesday. I am purposely pulling away from Blogdom for a season.

Anonymous said...

I confess, we need to work on the get away more often. With diabled children who can not be left alone for lond periods, it is difficult. I need to be more creative...:[

Marydon said...

Becky ~ Can't get away from him, he retired! Chuckle, just kidding!!

Would you be so kind to leave a comment on my BLOG ONLY, for the Miracle Makeover fund drive. Charlie, 8 yr. old, & his story are fabulous. Every comment brings us a $1 for the next person that will be sponsored.

Have a beautiful weekend.

Theresa said...

Way to go dear Becky! Sounds like a perfect getaway, short getaways are good! My Husband and I are both retired! We spend lots of time traveling around:) We REALLY enjoy our little getaways together! We talk a lot and I believe it keeps us connected!

Have a blessed day my friend! HUGS!

jAne said...

rocky travels plenty so getting away isn't a premium idea for him. so. i try to make our home a haven we both enjoy. he calls it a refuge. :o) i'd really like to get away though. big time. truth be told. so often here at home we're distracted by things to do (the never ending honey-do list), etc. getting away would be awesome... :o/

Bella Vista Cottage said...

Becky, Ron and I are longtime married...32 years.

We talk on a regular basis and if he doesn't men aren't wordy...I ASK him to. I learned long ago to ask for what I need.

I think it is a bit easier for us because we are also best friends. Ron is always in my corner....always. It makes it easy to talk with him. I am very blessed.

So glad you had this time together.

Barb ♥

Tracy said...

So happy you & Warren had a sweet time away--even for overnight! Having been married 11 years now, I know what you're saying...LOL! And I think most of us can relate to this topic as some point or other in our significant relationships/partnerships. Hubby & I have a strong foundation based on friendship, common interests, goals and values. So our starting point, if we get in a rut, so to speak, is a pretty good one. When life gets busy, as it does, sometimes we do literally have to stop and carve out time. A little getaway always helps. ;o) But at weekends we often try to do something together--not just grocery shopping either... LOL! It's the little things that mean a lot. Great post, Becky. Thank you for sharing. :o) Happy Days ((HUGS))

Country Wings in Phoenix said...

Good Morning Becky Sweetie...
What a beautiful share this morning. I love spending alone time with Tony as well. Seems sometimes we are so busy with our day to day lives, that we do forget to take time for "US". That is so important. After 35+ years of marriage, I realize that we are not as young as we used to be, and we need to live each day as if it were our last, and leave each other many, MANY happy memories of our time on earth here together.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts sweet friend. They touched my heart.

I would love to invite you over to my blog this morning to meet Charlie. He is an 8 year old that has cancer, and he is the recipient, he and his family for the Miracle Makeover by Design Gives Back and Guideposts Magazine. Every comment left on my blog will have 1.00 donated towards the next miracle makeover. We are running the makeover through August 18th, and yes you can leave more than one comment. I would appreciate it if you share the word with your blogger friends. Please stop by. Each comment makes a difference.

Country hugs and much love, Sherry

Vickie said...

Becky - I totally understand about time with your hubby. Tony and I are at the point that our children are about gone. My boys are, and my daughter will probably be in nursing school and then be married - looking that way right now anyway. We are finding more time for each other as we go through our days at work and home, and I must say that we don't miss the kids underfoot all the time. Yes we MISS them, but I think you're ready for each stage in life, and this is the stage that we're in right now. It's nice to have no responsibilities except to each other now, and it's great to be able to spend time together. We're tentatively making plans to make a long road trip together in the near future - just the two of us and I'm SO looking forward to it! Tony is, too! Glad you two could get away together!

JD said...

Hi Becky, Jim and I are married a long time! I was a teenage bride, there were years that we didn't see each other all week. I worked days he worked second and third shifts. Never seemed to be any time together...
and then years later...He RETIRED! Lots of time together now. What really worked for us, that we have been able to be together so long was a Marriage Encounter weekend...No I dont think you need a marriage encounter weekend, but one of things we carried over from that weekend was writing each other little notes. Even though, we now see each other every day, it's still nice to see the notes he writes on my birthday card, Christmas card, etc. and sometimes notes in between.

Donna said...

When Don and I were first married we were 20 and 22. We had 5 children over the next 20 years. Life was hectic...the years when we had 2 teens and a first grader and 2 babies I thought I'd go crazy. Oh, and did I mention that when our 2nd son went to college so did my husband! In those years it was Don's top dresser drawer that kept us connected. We wrote notes and sometimes long letters to eachother and left them in the top drawer. Sometimes it was an "I wish" letter. Sometimes a "Im sorry" letter usually with a snickers bar attached. sometimes a love letter with a bag of Hershey Kisses. Now, after 42 years of marriage we are at home together and retired from our first jobs and working part time
in these later years of our life.

I Love Don more now than I ever did when we were in our 20's. God has truly blessed me with a great man to love and care for. What a previlage to serve God and enjoy this life together.

Tracy said...

Every once in a long while we get away for an overnight together, but more often we have a date once a week. It's wonderful to focus on one another. Another thing is that we talk for several hours each morning as I walk and he drives.