It is getting closer.
My fifth surgery in 2 years.
In some ways I feel I am tempting fate.
How many times can one put themselves on
the operating table and come out ok?
Then the pain sets in and I think it will be worth it.
The date is not yet set but I know it is going to have to
happen.
I guess this, like absolutely everything else in life, has to be left in the hands of God. Not easy for a control freak.
I must rest in the fact that HE knows me. HE has a plan.
It certainly is not what I would have chosen, however, HE knows what is best.
I am glad that it is not about fate.
It is about an all knowing God, Who has had a plan
for my life since before the foundation of the world.
Awesome thought, isn't it.
HE knew ME!
Before I was...
Weird, But cool!
Why am I still scared?
I am human.
Oh, so human!
6 comments:
"So human" is ABSOLUTELY RIGHT. We were made to wonder, question, think. Those are gifts from God to help us on earth. Like all gifts, we can misuse them (like worrying about something that is in God's hands) but as long as we get back on the right path, all will be well.
Isnt that an amazing thought to think that God had our lives planned long, long ago...wow. And yes, we are all human, thats why we need Christ afterall!! I am sorry you will have to endure yet another surgery! I will be lifting this up in prayer...its never too early to begin praying!!
I think it is the control thing. We don't like to let it go -
I love you friend, and am praying that this is God's plan to teach you so much and now to end these lessons, He has been teaching you through surgeries and pain!
I am not sure we will be able to handle pain free Becky - cause your are so much fun now, what will it be like when you are feeling good? (I mean after we get your hormones in check! hee hee)
No we don't do we? When exactly is the day. My brain has been on too many Rx I cannot remember!
Before each of my surgeries I weep and am so fearful. Human? Oh yeah.
I trust you'll let us know when your surgery is scheduled. In the meantime, I continue in prayer for you. Hugs.
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